Sailor Moon R the Movie - Recriminations and Realisations
by SeerKing
Summary: Set in the same Universe as Apologies and Forgiveness, between episodes 61 and 68. A month after the events of Promise of the Roses, the Inner Senshi all suffer a vision of what might have been and come to conclusions about what must be done.


_**Sailor Venus, Leader of the Inner Planetary Senshi and Commander of the Bodyguards of Princess Serenity, otherwise known as Tsukino Usagi, felt as if her heart was shattering into pieces. She and the other Senshi, Mars, Mercury and Jupiter, were clustered kneeling around Tuxedo Kamen as he cradled a single precious cargo, that of their Princess, Sailor Moon.**_

 _ **And she was dead.**_

 _ **Usagi had used the Ginzuishō, the Legendary Silver Crystal of the Lunarian Royal Family, in order to allow herself, Tuxedo Kamen and her Senshi to survive the meteor they were on entering Earth's atmosphere. Fiore, the alien possessed by a sentient parasitic flower who had started the whole thing by kidnapping Mamoru, had dissolved after being hit by the Ginzuishō's power and realising that Usagi had been with him along with Mamoru all those years ago when he visited Earth the first time.**_

 _ **To use the Ginzuishō at the power level required to shield an entire meteor from the heat and pressure of atmospheric re-entry, as well as alter its course for safe entry, was to almost guarantee the user's death. Usagi had known that and had used it anyway, uncaring of her own life as long as her love and friends were saved.**_

" _ **You liar!" Mars sobbed, "Didn't you say you wouldn't die!?"**_

" _ **What was the point of us living when if you aren't here with us?!" Mercury cried.**_

" _ **Usagi-chan, please, open your eyes!" Jupiter begged as her tears fell.**_

" _ **We lost the one thing, the one person, who was most important to us after all…" Venus said miserably, "We failed our duty."**_

 _ **There was no miracle, no unexpected recovery. The Ginzuishō and the brooch it had rested in lay shattered upon Sailor Moon's unbreathing chest, and the Sailor Senshi had lost the only thing in their lives that had saved them from their isolation.**_

 _ **It was hell.**_

 _Early Morning_

 _Azabu-Jūban and Shiba Koen Areas, Tokyo_

Four girls woke up with screams of denial and loss that shook their homes. The only one to not have family living with her, Kino Makoto, stood up and ran to the bathroom and threw up violently as her body echoed her mind's instinctive rejection of the nightmare that she had just had.

Mizuno Ami had her mother living with her, but the elder Mizuno was a doctor on call and had left the house early, so Ami crawled out of bed and grabbed her phone, shakily looking through it to find the picture she had taken of Usagi the previous day on it, fighting with Rei as she usually did. It was the only thing that stopped her from throwing up similar to Makoto.

Aino Minako had woken her Moon Cat advisor, Artemis up with her scream and, before he could get a word out, he was being crushed in her arms as she hugged him for comfort. Her parents had left on a private holiday, so she knew that there would be no awkward questions about her 'unseemly and disgraceful behaviour' from her mother. Not that she cared. At the moment, she was focussed on recovering from her nightmare and reassuring herself that the dream was a lie.

Hino Rei had summoned both her grandfather and his apprentice, Yūichirō, with her scream. She didn't have to lie, because the High Priest of the Hikawa Shrine recognised the sign of a night terror and sent his apprentice away. She managed to convince him that it was a bad premonition about one of her friends being hurt, so she would meet them after school to tell them.

He gave her a knowing look before leaving and Rei couldn't help feeling that, yet again, her grandfather knew more about her 'secret' lifestyle than he let on about.

Refocussing, her mind analysed the horrible nightmare that she had just been subjected to and revolted. ' _It was a lie,_ ' she told herself, ' _Usagi is alive. You argued with her just yesterday when she read one of your manga without asking again. Your Princess is alive, not dead. SHE. IS. ALIVE!_ '

The raven-haired Miko was not looking forward to school today. At least Ami, Minako and Makoto would see Usagi at Jūban Middle School while she had to put up with waiting until she could escape from T-A Academy for Girls. One thing she was determined about was that upon graduation from the Middle School section of that prissy Catholic school, she would go to the same Highschool as her friends. Situations like this made it insufferable.

' _Damn you and your politics, old man._ ' The Miko thought towards her father, who had insisted that she attend the school as a good chunk of his constituents were Catholics and her attending the school would be good publicity for him. He hated her spiritual powers and had given custody over to her maternal grandfather, but interfered when it suited him.

Shaking her head, Rei headed for her bathroom so she could shower. It was going to be a long day until she could see her Princess.

 _Later_

 _Usagi's Class, Jūban Municipal Junior High_

Tsukino Usagi was having a funny day. Not funny as in 'funny ha-ha' but funny as in 'funny-weird'.

She had, for once, arrived on time for school, much to Haruna-sensei's shock. She'd even been asked if she was feeling well! How rude!

That was only the beginning. Her friends, Ami-chan, Mako-chan and Mina-chan, seemed to be more…affectionate…than normal. Mako-chan and Mina-chan had cuddled up next to her at lunch and she'd even been given a whole bento box from Mako-chan! Ami had hovered closer than normal and there had been something in their eyes that made her swallow any questions she might have about their odd behaviour. Fear and relief, mixed with an emotion that the odango'd blond couldn't understand, but felt was not to be questioned.

All in all, today was pretty out there. The only weirder thing was that the Black Moon Clan hadn't made any moves recently, which was a bit of a relief for her. She did, very, very secretly, like Chibi-Usa and didn't want her to be captured or killed by the weird people from who knows where. Of course, there was also the matter of her Mamo-chan, who was giving her the cold shoulder recently.

Things had been fine up until about a month ago, shortly after the whole deal with Fiore. He had been cold to her, broken up with her and confused the hell out of her. He still showed up as Tuxedo Kamen to save her and, when Chibi-Usa was around, treated her nicely, but without the petite pinkette, she might as well have been at the D-Point again for all the warmth he gave her.

' _I'm not sure how much more my heart can take._ ' The reincarnated Moon Princess though as said organ twinged painfully in her chest, ' _I love him and I know he loves me, but he's treating me like….like garbage! Why? Why is he doing this to me?! What the heck is going on with Mamo-chan?_ '

Ami, the only one of her Senshi in her class, was busy reading as usual, but just seeing her made Usagi smile a bit. Her Mamo-chan might be cold to her and confusing, but she had the best friends in the world that helped to ease that pain a lot. They had been so nice to her today that she hadn't thought about her maybe-ex-boyfriend until this moment, over three-quarters of the way through the school day.

Yes, having friends like hers was a blessing indeed.

 _After School_

 _Makoto's Apartment_

"Where is she?" Rei demanded irritably, her eyes showing her real emotions as she stormed into the apartment. She had had an awful day, and was in a bad mood.

"She's doing some grocery shopping for her mother before coming." Makoto said with a sigh.

"She'd better hurry up." The Miko muttered, "Damn dream."

"Dream?" Minako asked sharply, "What dream?"

"More like a nightmare." Rei admitted reluctantly, "It was about that bastard Fiore and Usagi using the Ginzuishō."

"She died and never came back." Minako whispered, her face going pale.

"How did you…?" Rei asked, taken aback.

"Because I had that nightmare last night too." The Senshi of Love said with a pained look on her face.

"Me too." Makoto added.

"That makes all of us." Ami sighed, a tear falling down her face before she brushed it away.

"OK, this is _not_ normal." Rei muttered, "Group dreams usually happen when the people in question are in close physical proximity to one another, which we weren't. Mina-chan lives in Shiba Koen, for crying out loud."

"That wouldn't make a difference." Artemis spoke up from his place on Minako's lap, "Just as you Inner Senshi are connected with your Princess, so too are you connected, albeit at a far lesser level, to each other. For this to happen isn't entirely impossible because of that link."

Rei massaged her temples and glowered at the Moon Cats. "Yet _another_ thing you neglected to tell us. Fine, whatever. Any clues to why we had these stupid nightmares?"

"Guilt, I would say." Luna said with a sniff, "You failed to keep the Princess alive and she's only alive now thanks to the mercy of this Fiore character. That must be affecting your psyches."

"But…this is the first time I've had this dream!" Ami protested, "I think I'd remember seeing that scene before!"

The other Senshi nodded in agreement.

"So, why now?" Minako reiterated, "Why exactly a month after that….that awful day?"

She shuddered, remembering her horror when the Ginzuishō and Usagi's brooch both shattered as they entered the atmosphere. She _never_ wanted to see that again.

There was silence before Makoto spoke up, her voice tinged with sadness.

"I guess this is how Usagi-chan felt after she got her memories back during the Doom Tree incident and remembered us all dying at the D-Point."

"She _has_ had nightmares about it since I restored her memories." Luna noted idly.

That realisation made the others slump. They had given their Princess such an awful memory that haunted her even now, and now they knew what it was like, or at least had an idea of what it was like, to be forced to go on alone without her. That was what they had wrought on Usagi. On their friend.

"This is worse than the time we made that stupid plan to get Mamoru-san back and we had to watch that damned Yōma strangle Usagi-chan in front of us." Minako said bitterly.

"Don't remind me." Rei said angrily, her fists clenching at the memory of that kunoichi knock-off torturing her friend and the Inner Senshi being forced to stand by and watch as a part of their plan.

"We have to become stronger." Ami said firmly, "So Usagi-chan has no reason to use the Ginzuishō's powers."

"Yeah, but I remember Artemis saying that our powers are really limited for some reason." Minako pointed out, throwing a look at her white Moon Cat.

"Compared to the Outer Senshi, your powers are limited." He objected before Luna hit him over the head with her paw.

"Idiot! They aren't supposed to know about them yet!" she yelled in his ear.

"Luna…spill it." Rei said flatly.

"Hah…fine. As bigmouth here has let the cat out of the bag, so to speak-" she glared at her counterpart at this, "-I may as well. In addition to the Inner Senshi of Mercury, Mars, Venus and Jupiter, there are also the Outer Senshi of Saturn, Neptune, Uranus and Pluto. It was their duty to protect the Silver Millennium from external threats. Each of them possessed power far exceeding that of the four of you combined, even with your Star Henshin Pens."

"My memories are fragmented, but no one had ever seen Sailor Pluto aside from Queen Serenity. Even knowing about the specifics of her duties was restricted to the Queen alone." Artemis added, "She and Sailor Saturn had special duties aside from guarding from external threats. Sailor Saturn, more to the point, had enough power to destroy an entire planet with one strike from her weapon, the Silence Glaive. It's one reason why she was known as the Senshi of Ruin and Rebirth."

Chills went down the spines of the Inner Senshi at the thought of someone wielding such power. Usagi could do the same with the Ginzuishō, but they knew their Princess would rather die than use it like that.

"Where the heck are they then?" Rei put in, "We coulda used them when Beryl and her Dark Kingdom were on the verge of conquering the world!"

Artemis and Luna shrugged, with Luna answering, "We have no clue. The two groups of Senshi were known as the Princess' Inner Court and the Queen's Outer Court and very rarely interacted outside of formal events. Our knowledge of them is spotty at best. Just about the only other thing I can recall is that Pluto was Venus' opposite number in the Outer Court."

"So you have no clue if they were sent forward by Queen Serenity as well?" Makoto asked. Seeing the headshakes from the Moon Cats, she sighed. "Just great. So, no counting on them to help out. So, what can we do? We can't just let things lie like this or I'll bet something about the Black Moon Clan will make Usagi-chan use that damn rock again."

"One thing that won't work is asking her to not use it." Ami put forward, "She knows the consequences of using it too much very well, but she has little regard for her own life if ours or Mamoru-san's lives are in jeopardy. She cares for us so much that she's willing to risk her life for ours, even when our duty is to protect her even at the cost of our own lives."

"Yeah, like that worked at the D-Point." Rei snorted, "She _felt and saw_ our deaths using an empathy bond that none of us knew was even there. We have to train our bodies and our magic so they can become stronger, as well as develop new attacks, because I don't know about you, but my _**Akuryō Taisan**_ , _**Fire Soul**_ and _**Fire Soul Bird**_ attacks are becoming way too ineffective against the Droids."

The others nodded. Their own attacks _were_ becoming less and less effective against their enemies, putting more pressure of Usagi, which wouldn't do.

Just then, the bell rang and the ravenette Miko was out of her chair in a flash, stomping towards the front door and hurling it open to see a surprised and worried looking Tsukino Usagi. Internally cheering as she finally got to see her Princess happy and well and _alive_ , externally, she looked her friend up and down with a critical eye.

"Wh-what is it, Rei-chan?" the odango'd blond asked self-consciously, "Have I spilled something on my clothes or something?"

"Nah." Rei said with a shake of her head, "Just wondering when you'll ever grow taller."

"I am too growing taller!" Usagi yelled, "Rei-chan you meanie!"

As the two squabbling girls entered the apartment proper, the faces of the other three Inner Senshi relaxed into smiles at the familiar sound. They _would_ get stronger, they _would_ protect their Princess and they _would_ stop her from killing herself with the damn Ginzuishō.

They would never see Usagi die again. That was their promise, both as her Senshi and her friends.


End file.
